Thursday, June 25, 2009

The Husband Store

A store that sells new husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband.

Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates.

You may visit the store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch: you may choose any man from a particular floor, or you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.

On the first floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men have jobs.

The second floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids.

The third floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking.

"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

She goes to the fourth floor and sign reads: Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help with the housework.

"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!!"

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and sign reads: Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads: Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.


A new "Wives Store" opened across the street.

The first floor has wives that love sex.

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money.

The third through sixth floors have never been visited.


okiedragon said...

lol - too funny.
I always thought I was the only woman who had thought that instead of the old testament One Husband Many Wives rule I wanted to start a religion that allowed for the opposite. One Wife and Many Husbands - well, one on each shift of work would do, so three is enough. Men are expensive creatures - toys that include every conceivable tool, boats, cycles, RC models, etc. Three incomes would go further and they could share. A new friend confided her same feelings - but she didn't know how we'd start it - I figured that the greenhouse could become the Plastic Cathedral of the Good Mother Earth News - where we'd sow seeds (literally) and in honor of the Mormon religion, I'd call it Nomrom - grins - it's just backwards!

Brian said...


Men don't share well. I'm not sure how well that One Wife Many Husbands thing would work out.

I've never understood the desire to have more than one wife though. One is all I can handle!


okiedragon said...

36 years and Mine still says no. Guess the one will have to do.